What makes you happy?

At just about every moment in my life, I am hunting down happiness: learning to recognize it, understand it and especially how to encounter the elusive beast a bit more frequently.

And yet, the things that make me happy seem to change at a pace that resists any attempt to examine them. For example, I've always had trouble answering the general questions people ask when they are trying to get to know me. They're the questions that allow us to weigh each other in the palm of our hands, trying to get a feel for who we are, what defines us, and what definitions one might share. But for those of us who are compulsively introspective, coming up with precise answers to nebulous questions isn't always a given: the answer you would get from a question as simple as "what is your favorite movie" might vary greatly from one month to the next, and certainly would from one year to the next.

Recently, reflecting on the things I do that bring me pleasure, I realized how much they've changed over the years. "What do you do for fun?" Senior year in high school? Having barbecues at home with lots of friends and playing dominoes until the sun went down. Freshman year in college? Partying, living in the moment. Last year in Angers? Seeing movies, talking with friends in a cafe or on a walk. This summer? Read, meditate, ride my bike. If you were to judge me based on this paragraph alone, you might think I'm many different people and not simply a flighty, indulgent individual. Not only that: I can't say in complete confidence that there is any indication of progress in my pastimes: who is to say that seeing a movie is any better than playing dominoes? Or that meditation is more worthy of one's time than partying might be? Of course, I exaggerate: though I have changed a great deal in the past ten years, there are a few things that have remained constant: my thirst for company, interaction and exchange with those around me; my leaning away from overstimulation and mainstream trends.

Am I the only one who struggles to answer these general questions? And is it a result of my own constant state of curiosity and exploration? Or is it a result of a meandering nature which inhibits more opportunities than it presents? If I were forced to choose between curiosity and consistency, I'd gladly pass on the quick answer and take instead my rich, introspective life.

And you? What makes you happy? What brings you pleasure here, now, today? What about last year? What about five years ago?