Italian Sausage and Swedish Meatballs

10/25/08

Hey all,

I'm here in Sweden! I got to Copenhagen late Friday night - the plane from Paris was delayed by an hour. But sure enough, I made it to Lund, where my friend Kim is studying abroad!

On the train from Copenhagen I had to transfer and got a little bit lost, so I found myself asking people if they spoke English. A young woman timidly replied "a little" and proceeded to attempt to explain the train lines to me. She struggled a great deal, but was very kind and eager to help. I thanked her, and said I was glad to have found someone who spoke English! As it turned out, however, she was French! I could have saved her the discomfort of struggling with a language in front of a stranger had I asked if anyone spoke French, instead of English... I chalk it up to imperialism. hahaha

We got to talking, and apparently she and three other girls are au pairs in Lund (nannies - I thought of you, O!). Her fellow au pairs (Germans) met her on our train from Malmo to Lund, and we all got to talking - apparently there's a building called the "Turning Torso" in Lund, which is worth visiting. We'll see! It was funny because we were speaking in German, French, and English - one of the German girls only spoke German and English, the other only spoke German and French, and the French girl and I only spoke English and French. Was a funny little conversation, to say the least.

The weather here was beautiful yesterday, as you'll see in the photos I will upload... we went to Helsingborg and explored a castle and looked for Halloween costumes for my friends there. Kim, the friend from UCSC who put me up, found leopard print ears and a tail - check the photos!

It was nice to see Sweden in the Fall... There's something vaguely familiar about Sweden's Anglo culture... Something about seeing wreaths and decorative squash for sale made me think of Halloween, a holiday that I don't entirely understand. Basically, I found my inner Viking in Sweden.

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11/5/08

Just to wrap up Sweden before moving on...

Candles are a big deal in Lund - in every store, one can find an abundance of them. The light is very soothing - there's something very pleasant about candlelight.

We visited the Lund Cathedral, an imposing old building that closely resembled my image of a haunted mansion on my first night in town. Inside was amazing - I highly recommend checking out my videos.

I left Lund for Milan on Wednesday morning, arriving at about 8pm Wednesday night. I hadn't booked a hostel in advance, so ended up in a dingy hotel with little light and unfriendly service.

I also found myself having a lot of trouble, not knowing a lick of Italian. I had gone banking on the notion that, being so close to the French border, the Milanese would speak a little bit of French, and if not French, perhaps English. However, it was neither French nor English, but my two years of high school Spanish that served me best in Italy!

I went to bed lonely and frustrated with myself for not planning things out better. At the time, I felt I should have either traveled with friends or stayed with Kim in Lund for the rest of vacation!

I woke up the next morning, however, and set out to wander the city, which is quite beautiful. I did a quick visit of Castle Sforza and wandered through the main streets branching off from the castle, getting a small taste of the student protests and having a bit of gnocchi at a little cafe for lunch.

I exercised extreme restraint when passing windows decorated with some of the finest silk shirts, ties, and scarves I have seen - I was even tempted to get a pair of nice socks! I was very proud of myself for not caving to my consumer-driven temptations... now, more than ever, it's important for me to save what little money I have to put towards the rest of my year abroad!

Though I had to leave for the airport at 1pm on Thursday, I am glad I got to see a little bit of what is (apparently) the biggest city in Italy. I learned my lesson, and will be sure to spend more than one day in Italy next time I go.

Oh, good news - I was recently informed that my request to extend my studies abroad from Fall semester to a full year has been approved. Now all I have to do is figure out how those studies will be paid for, and I can focus on my work!

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11/5/08 3pm

Hey all,

Sorry for the late update! Things have been crazy returning from vacation - I have ahd a great time catching up with friends and working myself back into the rhythm of school! It was nice to return to France and start speaking French again. Funny how much I missed it in Sweden... Though it was indeed nice to be in a country where most of the population speaks almost flawless English, there was something I missed about speaking French. Though I still have a lot of room to improve, and most likely always will, I definitely enjoy hearing and speaking the language.

Returned to Bordeaux at about 11:30pm on Thursday night. I hopped on the first tram back 'home' (it was pouring rain!) and settled down for the short ride back to a familiar bed. As it was raining, and I had no umbrella, I asked the girl sitting next to me if getting off at another stop would be closer. She answered me politely - nothing out of the ordinary. However, when I turned my head and made eye contact to thank her, I realized she was sobbing uncontrollably, silently wiping tears away. It felt horrible to know I had callously asked such a trivial question when this girl was bearing so much pain... I felt a pang of guilt, but reassured myself that she must be feeling horribly awkward herself - the tram is certainly not the most private of places.

Fortunately, I had a million kleenex on me (thanks mom!) and I encouraged her to take as many as she wanted. For the rest of the ride, I was a little stupefied, tempted to try to comfort her, but at the same time wanting to maintain a respectful distance, recognizing I had no idea what she was going through. I also didn't want to add to her embarrassment by drawing attention to her sorrow... I was tempted to just reach over give her a hug! (hugs, by the way, are NOT French... not in my experience, at least) I fought back the urge to try and sympathize, as I so often do in my assuming way. I tend to forget that the world doesn't revolve around me, and that my own sadness cannot be compared outright with that of another. In the end, I settled for a meager "I hope things get better", and "there's always tomorrow!" in the cheeriest voice I could muster. I left the tram feeling consumed by thoughts of pain and sadness, and how lonely suffering can be. Sometimes, I feel only a stranger can comfort us in the way we need it most - through unconditional understanding. Though I felt I hadn't done everything I could for this young woman, it felt good to walk home reflecting on what I had experienced.

My host family was still gone for vacation when I returned to Bordeaux, and they wouldn't be coming back until Sunday, so I wrapped up and read in bed for most of my weekend, putting off a measly paper on Stendhal for impossibly dark Baudelaire poems on a rainy weekend.

On Saturday, a Quebequois family came to visit - the father and mother are academics who moved from Bordeaux to Quebec about 4 years ago, and they come once a year during Toussaints to visit my host family and stay in their house in Nice. The mom was away on business, but the father, Bernard, and his two kids Elise (5?) and Matteo (8?) stayed in the daughter's room across the hall. The dad was really cool - the first day they arrived they went "shopping", and he bought what must have been about 3 kilos of candy. The little boy got sick from the candy, naturally, and they ran around the house like crazy for three days straight. The kids were adorable! I really liked having all that energy in the house - the 17 year old son is the most rambunctious between the four of us, but nothing really compares to the positive energy and plain ol' happiness of kids.

It really lifted my spirits at a point when I was feeling terribly homesick and sad. When they left today, the boy clutched on to me and wouldn't let me go - it was really cute but kinda sad! Kids get so close to people so quickly! Though it seems strange to me that he should do so, maybe it's adults that are the weird ones - we form all these barriers to protect ourselves from being hurt to the point that it becomes perfectly natural to say goodbye. Though it was sad to see the boy in tears, I was really touched by his affection for someone he really didn't know that well! I didn't feel like I made a tremendous effort to connect with these kids, but the connection was made nonetheless. Adorable.

It also reminds me that sometimes life isn't all that short, and that fate brings people back together. I was happy to see him leave, because I knew he would have some amazing stories for me the next time I saw him - be it in one year or ten!

Am going to the Grand Theatre tonight with some girlfriends - going to see my first ballet! I'm really excited - for whatever reason, I've never exposed myself to opera, theatre, or ballet! This should be an amazing experience, and these girls are a lot of fun. I'm definitely in for a treat. Not to mention the Grand Theatre is gorgeous!

Before I go back to homework (host mom and I will be reading by the fireplace upon her return from dropping the Quebequois off at the airport), I'd like to indulge in something I've been tempted to speak on for a while now. I'll do my best to keep things short - I could write a book on the politics of the last two months, especially concerning the unique perspective I've been exposed to here in France.

I'm mounting my soapbox, so flee now or forever speak your mind.

Today, on the 5th of November, 2008, I feel like I can once and for all say, with a deep swelling pride, that I am an American. Last night the American people (myself included) elected Barack Obama as President of the United States of America. Not only was he elected, he won by a landslide. And strangely enough, it wasn't so much his speech about the great struggle we have before us, or the culmination of the American spirit coming together that touched me; it was he who graciously stepped aside that I found to be the most moving of the night.

I never thought I'd be praising Senator John McCain, but his performance last night in the face of overwhelming defeat was admirable.

John McCain stepped up to a podium in front of his supporters and conceded defeat with great dignity and poise, giving his own bitter feelings after losing a hard-fought election (and it was difficult, for both men) a back seat for the sake of both the voice of the people and the path of history. He spoke with a sincerity that did not weigh heavy on his words, but instead contributed to a surprisingly surreal feeling that history is actively being MADE. He recognized that now is a time for America to become, once again, as President Obama has repeated time and time again, the UNITED States of America. No longer can we let primary colors dictate the level of respect with which we treat one another.

He stepped up and encouraged his supporters to take all the passion and energy that they contributed to his failed campaign and to put it towards helping their new president rebuild this country of boundless potential. I was impressed with his integrity and clarity - something that did not show in his previous speeches. It seemed like the crowd of booing supporters no longer suited the class act on the podium. What we witnessed was two great men fight the good fight - one made mistakes and lost, the other didn't.

In a gesture of geniuine humility that contradicts the McCain I've seen, he said "Today, I was a candidate for the highest office in the country I love so much, and tonight, I remain her servant - that is blessing enough for anyone".

In stepping aside graciously, John McCain set the precedent and gave the Republican party something to be proud of last night. Not an easy feat, by far. I hope Americans can find it in themselves to recognize how great a feat that is after 8 years of seemingly boundless shame.

Though I was not lucky enough to join most of you in the US to celebrate this historic event, I still feel like I played a special role in it all the way out here in France. I spoke my mind, and represented my ideals without attempting to speak on behalf of the US. After all, I consider myself unique even amongst Californian liberals.

Lastly, Sarah Palin and her sensationalist rhetoric scares me half to death - I desperately hope against hope that she disappears.

I realize praising McCain may seem to contradict my fervent support of President Obama, and that some of you might disagree with what I have written here. I would argue that in the spirit of coming together as a country we must learn to see the gray area that is often obscured by media overload. We must make the effort to show the weakness that is strength, and recognize the good in that which is portrayed as evil.

I wish you all the best and thank you for taking the time to read this enormous update. It's important to me that you're reading this - the only thing better than living an experience is sharing it.

With love,
Ben